.misplaced.

grrraaaaAAHHH! i love happy days. C:

except somethin' is always missin'.

[mybestfriend]

wish she could be here everyday with me. aaaaaall day.
wish i could share every moment of my day with her.
..actually, i think i'm gonna do that. yupp! sure am.
C:
i love her soooooooo much.

[mybestfriend]




sh.

.hahahahaha!.

don't ya just loooove laugh attacks? C:
natalie and i do.

bahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahhahahaha
hahahaahhahaahhahahaha
hahahahaahahhaha
hahahahaha
haahhaa
hahah
hah
ha.

okay, not funny anymore.

hahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahah.

one more for good measure? ...

hahahahahahahahhahhahahahahahahaah
ahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahhaahhahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahhaahhahahha
hahahahahahahahahhahahahhahah
hahahahahahhahahhahahahahah
hahahahahahahahahahahahhah
ahahahahahahhahhahahaahah
hahaahahahahahahahahahha
hahahahahahahahahahahah
hahahahahahahhahahaha
hahaahahhahahahahaha
hahahahaahhahahaaha
hahahahahahahahah
ahahahhahahahaha
hahahahahahahaa
hahahahahahaha
ahhaahahhaha
haahahhahah
ahahahahah
ahahahaha
hahahaha
hahahah
ahahah
ahaha
haha
hah
ha.


<3


sh.

.we'llbeadream.

i hate this.
i fucking hate this.
my eyes are tired of crying.
i'm tired of balling up every night and sobbing over you.
i'm sick of this.
i'm so over it.
i know i'll give in too, bc i'm not fucking strong enough to stay away.
i fucking hate you.
i fucking hate you.
i fucking hate you.

i can hardly even tell what i'm fucking typing.

breathe.
breathe.
breathe.
breathe.
breathe.
breathe.
breathe.

okay...
i apologize for the momentary lapse of self control..

but, if you seriously don't feel a thing, let's skip to the part when you leave.
i don't know why you can't be what i need you to be..
i'm sooooo disappointed...
so.
incredibly.
disappointed.

i'm gonna dry my eyes of all the tears i've been weak enough to let you make. and i'm going to go to bed nightmare free. and i'm going to dream of someone out there who was made to help me. and i'm going to be okay..

i'm going to be okay..

i'm going to be okay..





sh.

please.just.let.me.be.love

why?

why? why? why?

why do i always fall so hard? fall so hard for the guys that aren't even worth it?!!
my heart can't take it anymore. idk why i always do this to myself...

i just want to fall for a nice boy with good morals. i want him to want me and to always want me. not just toy with me and have me chasing a string to just lead to a dead end.

it's not fair. this whole love thing isn't fair.
i'm tired of hurting.
i'm just so, so tired.


am.

.forgiveme.

You forgive me for raising you up so high,

And I'll forgive you for bringing me down so low.

You forgive me for wanting to be with you,

And I'll forgive you for avoiding me.

You forgive me for being so pathetic,

And I'll forgive you for taking advantage of it.

You forgive me for not being able to let go,

And I'll forgive you for never having latched on.

You forgive me for missing you so,

And I'll forgive you for being so cold.

You forgive me for giving up on us,
and I'll try to forgive myself for not giving up sooner..


sh.

neverland.

i love you

you say so, but i think it is your biggest pretend.

sh.

.moderndayshakespeare.

[she sits on ground drawing in the dust beneath her.]
[they enter stage right and approach her.]

they ask:

do you regret it?

[she stops drawing and looks up]

she says:

no, not at all. i forced myself to be like everyone wanted me, or perhaps, even needed me to be. my whole life revolved around meeting expectations and when i finally got away from it all, when i finally broke free, i loved it. i needed to become everything i hated, everything morally wrong, a thing of disgust in the eyes of most, drawing pity from every figure who looked my way, because i was that torn down and broken. i was tired and fed up.

[she stands and faces them.]

i had to lose myself in order to find myself.

i once was lost, but now am found.

i now know who i am. i know where i'm going. i have my morals in check and i will conquer every goal i set. i am stronger than i've ever been. so, no. i will never regret that life changing experience of losing myself, because i've found a better me. and i'm never letting go.

[she turns and exits stage left.]

[deleted scene.]

girl 1:

you know what i mean?

[she looks at girl 1 sad at first, quickly turned to anger, then slowly subsiding to pity]

she says:

yes, i know exactly what you mean. for the exact instance happened to me a long while ago with someone very special. someone whom i trusted above all else. someone who could have been great, but chose instead to become a coward, hidden behind lies that are too weak for their own good. girl, i know exactly what you mean..

and not only are your words incredibly ironic..

they still cut me just as deeply as before..

[she exits stage right. never seen again by girl 1.]

sh.

learning.

half of life is messing up.
and the other half is dealing with it.





am.