help.

blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
that's basically how i can sum up everything that i'm feeling right now.
first off, it is only the first day of classes and already have a butt load of homework! like seriously what the hell!
secondly, i miss my bestest friend in the entire world. i hate when i'm walking and i see all these best friends rooming together and laughing and walking together. ugh soo that's frustrating.
and third, i just feel lost. i don't know why, but i just do. i don't know what i want in life anymore. i know i want answers, lots of them! but i don't know what questions i have....if that makes sense. i just wish i could go back to me knowing. me knowing exactly what i want.


am.

please.stop

if i had a wish,
any wish at all.
i wish this night would freeze.
tomorrow is going to come too soon.



am.

.Amor.

I have missed you.
I miss you.
I will miss you.

you're.my.priority.

oh my dearest best friend. these past days have been exciting and thrilling and basically amazing. i have missed you sooooo much! i should've fought for your attention more. but that's in the past because like always we fall into each others arms. and college is only another stepping stone that we'll make it through./

i pinky promise.



am.

.ohlove.

I've needed you for such a long time. I'm sorry he was in the way so much. But now he's not and I'm glad I can be with you. Because I've missed you like crazy girl.


sh.

bring it.

you're only going to let me down.
when it counts.
you're only going to turn me out.
as i burn, you burn out.
you're only going to make me feel so crazy.
but when i think we could be something.
you go and let me down.




am.

.runaway.

It's been a long week. I've got a slow leak in my left front tire. I'm sick of where I work. My boss is such a jerk, don't care if I get fired. My backs about to break, no money in the bank, and he don't call me anymore. I'm down to my last ring. It's time to sell my things.

I'm gonna pack my bags and never look back run a parallel line with the railroad tracks and make my get away. I put the pedal to the metal as the sun goes down and everybody's sleeping in this sleepy town tonight and at the break of day..
I'll be a runaway..
It's crazy I know to count on this road to give me what I need. But with every state line somehow I find another part of me.


sh.

please believe.

there's no way i would ever forget you.
time will always go on and i will never lose you.
always stay in touch.
i mean it's kinda hard to go on in life with only half of me.


am.

.ijustwannabemad4awhile.

I didn't talk to you bc I felt like my two best friends totally ditched camping. I was so excited I told you a month in advance and I know you didn't tell Kelly right away bc that's just the way you are. But I would've thought you would've made an attempt. So I was waiting for an apology but at the bonfire you were just having all this fun with everyone else so I left. You didn't even look at me or try to say anything.. So I thought I'd return the favor.. It's not easy for me to be sitting at home all alone while you're out with lexy doing all your inside jokes either. I'd be in the same situation but I just choose to stay in doors bc I know I'll be left. You'll forget me next year. And the year after that. And the year after that..

sh.

miss you more. unbelievably more. but lance and I are on a break. if that sparks your intrest at all.

ouchie.

i miss you.

i miss you so much.

i miss you so much that it hurts.




am.

lost.in.you.

maybe you don't realize it. but when she's back, you change. and i don't feel as if it's a good change. i know you haven't seen her in forever and that she's obviously the true best friend of yours but you don't have to pretend like i don't exist. i'm standing here looking like a stupid dog waiting to get approval or something. i know that it's my fault too, that i could try. but you try walking up to 2 laughing girls having crazy fun together. sitting there doing their inside jokes and telling their secrets. it's not easy.

i don't have someone like her. all i have is you. which i thought was always enough, but now i'm thinking otherwise. i don't like standing alone in the rain watching my best friend run off with someone else with the umbrella.


am.

.Lonely.

I'm hurt.
I'm disappointed.
I'm scared.
I miss him already.
I miss her.
I refuse to admit it's probably for the best.
I hate endings.
And I'm going to pray for sanctuary.


Sh.

reaching the end.

is this dark hole comforting or lonely?


am.

reaching the end.

is this dark hole comforting or lonely?


am.